"That's an Apan warstinger," said the tall chap. "Running a little earlier than we thought." He turned to face Greh and his grin had a new, startling grimness. "I think we'd better be getting back to the TARDIS, don't you?"

The Apan Hive considers itself a civilised culture, but even the civilised get hungry: when someone has the Food there is no choice but to take it from them. Unluckily for the planet Verdant, the galaxy's third-largest natural source for unrefined hydromel, that ravenous appetite has just arrived in orbit looking for take away.

Well that's one take on the situation. Naturally the Doctor suspects something else is behind the invasion and it doesn't take long for him to be proven correct. A shadowy corporation hunts for somebody who isn't in his right mind, old friends and enemies are shuffled around the board by a transdimensional mastermind, and an insidious bioweapon that quite literally changes the face of warfare waits to be released.

And the only person who is who he claims to be is starting to find it all a soul crushing bore.

This is the first round-robin story featuring the 'Shalka' Doctor.

Certain characters in this story (mentioning no names) may be copyright the BBC, and/or Fox, and/or Virgin Publishing. Each chapter is © its author, as credited below.



Discontinuity Guide
Internet Adventure Publication Order
Preceded by

Not Even A Whisper

Followed by

The Dreamlife of Monsters

'Shalka' Doctor Adventures
Preceded by

Followed by

The Dreamlife of Monsters


Originally posted: 16 September 2003 - 18 November 2003


  1. "You Never Can Tell With Bees" — Paul Gadzikowski
  2. "A Little Warning Would Have Been Nice" — Molly Schlemmer
  3. "I'm Just A Girl" — Odd Rod
  4. "The Swirl Of Stardust" by Kiri
  5. "The Bee's Knees, The Cat's Whiskers And The Dog's... Concerned" — Em Pepys
  6. "Interlude – Sunrise" — Jon Andersen
  7. "Silent Chapter" — Aron Toman
  8. "All Change" — Kris Herzog
  9. "Conclusion" — Rebecca 'Da Mod' Dowgiert



Rebecca 'Da Mod' Dowgiert



Jon Andersen


Cover Artist

Jon Andersen


Alternate Covers


Dramatis Personae

Guest Cast





Plot Victims

Doctor Who In-jokes

Fashion Victims

Double Entendres

Dialogue Disasters

Dialogue Triumphs




Future History

Unwritten Adventures

The Bottom Line


Internet Adventures

Internet Adventures Discontinuity Guide